Oh I hate micro$oft

July 21st, 2014

OK so it’s been a while since I posted on here, because I’ve been fairly chilled and not needing to rant.

Today, not so much.

So, I have a copy of windows 7. I don’t like Windows, obviously, but I have it. I need it as the hardware I’m using for some video work only runs on Windows. I have no real choice.

So, Windows.

I install it, I leave it running a 7 hour job doing video processing, and come back to discover that 6 hours into the job, it rebooted itself to do some updates.

*ARGH* wasted me a day. I was angry then, but it just got better and better.

After the updates had happened, it then told me that the key wasn’t valid, I couldn’t activate it. It’s a valid key, the thing is just being broken.

So I have to call them. I have to go through their menu system and entry a FIFTY FOUR DIGIT code, before it then asks me ‘how many computers is this installed on.

So, I sit there, look at it, and wonder if it means including this one, not including this one, is it 0 or 1.

I’m trying to guess which answer I should give, when it tells me to press 1 for one install, 2 for more than one install.

I’m half way through pressing zero at that point, and it registers my keypress, and tells me it’s an invalid option.

So, it then tells me to try again. Press 1 for more two or more, press 2 for just one computer. Note: It’s reversed the options.

I press 2, and it tells me that I can’t activate it on more than one computer, and then hangs up on me.




So, I call back, do it all again, to find that after entering the 54 digit code, that I’ve been locked out.


So I call back again, and press nothing, in the hopes I get through to someone instead.

Hooray, I do. In India.

They can’t understand a word I say. Literally. They claim that the line was full of static. Great, except I’m using skype – which THEY BOUGHT, and which works talking to ANYONE ELSE.

I end up giving up and hanging up. And repeat.


Every time, nope, they have no idea what I’m saying.

At this point I’ve spent almost two hours trying to activate this piece of shit, not to mention the 7 hours work it wasted for me earlier today.


And people wonder why I prefer Linux.


Tottenham Rioters, your attention please

August 7th, 2011

You have claimed to be wanting justice. How about a little logic instead…

There were 4 shots fired in the incident you are rioting about. Two by police. Now, here comes the logic.

Two must have been fired by Mark Duggan. This is a mathematical fact.

Due to the fact he died of his injuries within minutes (another fact) what do you think the chances are that, after being shot, he went out, bought a gun, and fired it twice at police. All without leaving the cab?

OK so for those hard of thinking among you (I include all of the rioters here), there is zero chance of this, unless he happened to have hitched a ride with an arms dealer moonlighting as a cabbie. OK, so we can rule that out.

So, we know for a fact he had a gun with him. That alone means he was due for arrest, and isn’t the ‘poor innocent man’ that some are trying to portray him as.

So, moving on, we know he had a gun. Now, we know he was so badly injured he didn’t make it out of the cab alive. So, taking that into account, lets look at the two possible scenarios.

1) He fired twice at police, who returned fire, and killed him.

2) Police fired at him for no reason, causing significant injury. After which he got out the gun, and accurately fired at the police, who didn’t return fire, but simply stood around until he stopped firing and died of his injuries.

Because, people, those are the ONLY two possibilities.

Logically you are probably going to have to admit, that the chances of scenario 2 are unlikely.

So, basically, you are rioting because police shot someone who shot at them first.


But then, the fact you are rioting and looting said that anyway.


Royal Mail – PLEASE DIE

November 4th, 2010

I am so so beyond furious at the Royal Mail right now. I have been having shitty service from them for years, but today just takes the prize.

So, on Saturday I had a missed delivery – it was a time-critical delivery, for someones birthday, and was needed for Tuesday. I was in the house at the time, the postman obviously just tapped on the door and ran away, too busy to wait, running late and wanted to get home, who knows, all I know is, I was there, sitting about 5 feet from the front door, and I sure as hell didn’t hear him. OK, so go to their redelivery website, earliest redelivery, Tuesday. Why they can’t manage Monday, two days from then, is beyond me, but OK. So, Tuesday comes and goes, and no delivery, not even a card this time.

Wednesday comes, and so does the package, late of course. It had written all over it ‘redelivery wednesday 3rd’, which after checking my browser history is NOT what I had requested. I hadnt made a mistake, they had just not done the delivery on the right day.

So, onto thursday, today.

AGAIN a delivery, this time not time critical, but that doesn’t really matter, is missed, again I am sitting feet from the door according to the time on the card, and again, I hear nothing.

So, I am sick of this. This has been going on for a long time, their second postmam, who covers the primaries day off, is fine, I always hear him. I have a doorbell, a doorknocker, and whichever he uses, I hear him. The primary though, ffs, he must just tap lightly and run for the hills. He also does wonderful things like, a group of 5 packages, all sent individually, he will put an elastic band around them, and instead of then later taking off the band, he then sticks a card through the door saying ‘too big for delivery’ when if he TOOK OFF THE BAND which he had put on there in the first place, they could all have been delivered through the letterbox. But no, the lazy bast* won’t even do that. Not to mention a friend who lives on the same street as I do, had what were obviously birthday cards folded in half so the postman could fit them all through the door in one go, when if he had done his job properly, they could have all gone through with no folding.

So, I am finally sick of this, I go to the post offices website and try and find a complaints form. I go round and round in circles, where it describes methods of leaving feedback but doesn’t link to them, and finally I get to a point where I can leave a message, I have to select a subject, none of which are complaints, all are things like ‘I want a job there’ or ‘I want to bulk-send’ and stuff. So, I am out of patience with the website, so next stop, phone call.

Call them up, on their number that costs to call, thanks for that. Selecting through the options there is NO WAY to get through to a complaints department. So after two cycles through their neverending or deadending menu options I just sit there not pressing anything and finally it decides I have a rotary phone and puts me in a call queue.

I get through to a woman who I start chatting to fairly chattily, as of course it wasn’t her fault, so the conversation goes something like this:

‘Hi, I was just wondering where your postmen train for their ninja skills?’

‘Ninja skills??’

Well, yes, I assume they are trained in this way, as it is the only way they could knock on my door when I am only feet away from it, and my not hear it.

Oh, so you had a missed delivery?

Second time in a week, yes, and I was there both times.

Can I have your postcode

Sure, its <insert postcode here>

And what number on your street

Well, Im not too sure Im happy to reveal that, as I dont want it passed on to the postman that I raised a complaint and then I never see any of my mail for the next 6 months, cant you just work with the postcode

We dont accept anonymous complaints, at least have the courage to stand by your convictions

EXCUSE ME? Put me through to your manager right now, you do not talk to me like that.

Give me your details or I am unable to put you through.

<firmly>No, put me through to your manager

I don’t have to sit here and take this, if you wont give me your details I cant help you

Excuse me, I was perfectly pleasant when I came through and your attitude has been appalling to a customer, put me through to your manager now

Not until you give me your details

Right, what is your name, I will call back and have someone else put me through

I am not giving you my name. <hangs up>

Rude representatives, ninja postmen, shitty service



Labour may have just chosen who I vote for

April 28th, 2010

Looks like Ken Clark (a Conservative MP for those not in the UK) decided to say the Labour party did something right.

Immediately the Labour party jumped on this as if he has been saying hisown party makes all the wrong decisions.

Way to go polarising parties and damaging the ability of parties to co-operate. I mean, what the hell is that all about. Yes politics is supposed to be confrontational, but when someone says you were right, you then go put their backs up by crucifying them. How DUMB are you.

So add that to the David Davis civil rights stand, and, even though I think a lot of their policies are hot air and they really do have a fine are of pulling numbers out of their ass, the Conservatives just increased their chance of getting my vote, to the detriment of Labour.


The great ash cloud

April 19th, 2010

Well, for the last 4 days, the UK has been a no-fly-zone. Caused by the eruption of some volcano whose name I can’t spell, in Iceland. Why do they make names so long…

Anyway, so, after a few days of this, the airlines are currently complaining about the amount of money this is costing them, and how they could find no reason to not fly. To give him credit, the test flight done by British Airways was done by their CEO, I can respect a man willing to put his money where his mouth is.

But hold on, they reckon that there is no danger. Err, what about two F18’s in Finland last week, or a group of NATO F16’s this week. Both damaged by the volcanic ash.

If you ask me, if the military, with its vastly overspecced machines, designed for the most extreme conditions, cannot handle it, what on earth makes anyone think that budget airlines, created by the lowest bidder, are going to be able to handle it??

And now they talk about compensation, about how the choice to not fly was unfairly taken out of their hands??

HELLO – the government making this decision is probably losing votes right before a general election because of it, and yet, still they do it. Why, because the SCIENCE suggests they may have a point. The EVIDENCE suggests there is a risk. Now, do we trust the government and the science and the evidence, or do we trust the airlines who, when all is said and done, if they have a crash, will not lose a single penny once the insurance pays out.

All they care is that the money comes in, if they lose a plane or two, oh no, never mind, better than losing the £15M a day that they are losing, right?



Banking Bonuses

March 31st, 2010

Well, the armchair drivers of the country who think they know everything. Lets look at your latest screwup.

The banking sector has been having a bad time. They made some bad decisions, and lost a lot of money, but let us look at why.

1) Companies traded on the stock exchange are legally obliged to maximise profit for investors. This means that they have to take risks and try and do whatever they can to make profit.

2) When the banks got into trouble, because of point 1), everyone blamed the bank bosses. The same bank bosses that had made huge profits for the last 15 years, because this year they were hit with problems caused by a global economic crisis that, lets face it, the armchair critic didn’t see coming any more than the top financial analysts in the world, then suddenly these bosses are ‘useless’. Really, because they have a failure rate of just over 6.5%. I bet that the VAST majority of people in the country don’t keep out of their overdraft for 15 years.

3) So, the bank bailout. Oh my god how can the government step in and spend billions of our tax money to save banks that screwed up? Well, because if they didn’t the following would happen:

  • Everyone who has money in the bank would lose it. Sure they get it back through the banking insurance system (up to a limit), but who do you think pays for that? The taxpayer. You pay for it either way.
  • Once you let one major bank fail, you lose a lot of confidence in the sector. Other banks become at risk and possibly fail. More expense for the insurance payouts. OR, you realise you need to save the banks, but now it is much more expensive due to weakened conditions compared to if you had saved the first one
  • Allowing a banks to fail, lets take RBS for example, would lead to 141,000 redundancies, right there, 141,000 people out of work, claiming benefits and not paying taxes. Who pays for these benefits, the taxpayer. Who gets hit with higher taxes to make up for the shortfall of 141,000 well paid people? The taxpayer.
  • The RBS investment bank division made 5 billion in profits last year. That means about 1.4 billion in tax revenue, plus about 3 billion in increased value of the company. That is about 120 pounds per taxpayer last year that the government didn’t have to find elsewhere. That is money you get to keep.

So now we come to the main point of the article – bank bonuses.

Everyone is screaming how bank bonuses should be suspended because of the problems. RBS cut bonuses and people left. Who cares right, they were the greedy ones.

Yeah until you look at the numbers. They cut 400 million in bonus payments and lost staff who they expected to make profits for the company of 1bn

That is a net loss of 600 million pounds. Money that is lost from a company that the taxpayer owns. Because the armchair expert decided they knew best. And thanks, you cost every taxpayer in the country about £20 right then and there. Thanks for that.

The banking sector is incredibly complex. The more we stop rewarding success, the more this sector, and every other with that attitude, suffers. Rewarding success is the only way to ensure success. If we lose the strong banking sector that the UK has, we become a third rate power. You can expect to see 10 million unemployment, and getting handouts from the IMF, because it is our biggest industry, and if we don’t protect it, we as a country are screwed.

So, before you become an armchair expert – remember this one fact



Oh Amazon recommendations, I hate you

March 21st, 2010

Amazon recommendations used to be a handy tool for suggesting things I may have forgotten to buy or add to my wishlist. But they have just gone over the top in trying to extract the most tenuous links between things and shoving them on the list, making it utterly useless.

It suggests things I bought from other peoples wishlists – WHY – it was obviously not for me, why would I want the second one in the set?!?

It suggests things I already bought in Blu-ray – maybe I’d like them on DVD too?

I clicked on ‘not interested’ on a film in DVD, refresh the page, maybe I wanted it in bluray. No, not interested. How about the second film in the set? NO. In Bluray? NO STOP ASKING ME ABOUT THE SAME THINGS.

Wow, I added a film to my wishlist, hows about THIS suggestion that has no relation whatsoever to the one I added other than it came out within 5 years.

Because you added ‘Sherlock Holmes [DVD 2009] to your wish list, maybe you would like – ‘Fantastic Mr. Fox’ – what the hell? Their common link? They are both films I guess. I can’t see a single thing they have in common. Really.

Amazon – BUY A CLUE!


FFS – Facebook is NOT dangerous!

March 18th, 2010

I cant believe the hassle facebook is getting for the fact that one person was killed after being tricked into meeting someone they shouldnt have, and how facebook is being dragged through the mud over it.


Lets look at the stats shall we.

Facebook has 400 million users

Average user spends 55 minutes a day on facebook

The average age of a Facebook user is a bit over 25, so lets say that, on a curve, 15% of users are in the ‘at risk’ age group.

That means 60 million hours of facebook time for kids.

That would mean, as an equivalent, of all the recreation time of all the children in the UK. And one – ONE gets killed. Compared to the much higher number that vanish through means such as walking through a park, or getting into the wrong car. Do we force car manufacturers to add safeguards. Hows about park owners (the government themselves). No. Sure, keeping kids safe is good, but THEY ARENT MADE OF GLASS. You do not need to overprotect kids, just be sensible! Just because it is THE EVIL INTERNETS, it is – looking at those – SAFER for them to be on facebook than roaming the streets.

Get off of facebooks case, deal with REAL PROBLEMS in the world rather than new companies who are easy targets for public outrage because it is a vote winner.

UK Government – YOU SUCK.


Compulsory Dog Insurance

March 9th, 2010

In the latest example of disassociated thinking, the government is proposing mandatory insurance for all dogs in the UK. This is to provide compensation for people that are attacked, and is supposed to deter people from owning dangerous dogs.

Hold on, what?

You deter people from owning dangerous dogs by making them pay a small premium to move the responsibility elsewhere? Wow, let me get TWO dangerous dogs, I am not at risk of financial penalty any more!

And tell me, WHY should the owners of mild mannered dogs, and the owners of Yorkshire terriers that, even though they are viscous little buggers, couldn’t even break the skin on most people without a week of effort, pay for the problems caused by pitbull owners?



Weather prediction for the hard of thinking

January 8th, 2010

Right, I start this rant off in the full knowledge that weather prediction is tricky. It is a dark art at best, pure guesswork at worst.

But sometimes, you have to stop and look at the weather services and think – what the hell…

Lets take the BBC weather website yesterday.

Their daily overview for my area said: ‘Heavy Snow’

OK fine, heavy snow. When is that. Lets click to the hourly breakdown and see when I should expect to have to deal with heavy snow.

Errr, each one of the breakdown predictions shows no snow. HOW can the main overview of the day be heavy snow, when there is no snow! You contradict yourself!

Today on weather.co.uk

For my area, the daily temperature range is -7 to +5

No problem. Except, wait, the hourly breakdown shows temperature in an hour to be -9


I mean, I understand it isn’t a hard science but you are making it up! You cant even agree with what you said on the last page!